My knee is quite a lot better today. I can walk up and down stairs with no problems. It's still slightly swollen and very painful to touch but the left knee is totally fine so I'm sure I'll be fine. It doesn't look anywhere near as bad as it feels!
Maybe it's the pressure of the next week or so; travelling down to London with the little one, running a marathon after injury, heading to a conference where I have to get all dressed up.
I keep seeing people running and am very aware it's been a few weeks since I last ran. I'm nervous. I'm not a runner. I know I will do it but at the same time I don't know if I can. My leg should be ok. My knee will have to be. I even turned my ankle earlier in a dip as I was in the park with the little one. Luckily it was ok but it has felt today like the world is against me.
I feel inadequate for not getting these things sorted.
I am tired today too. Really tired after waking up at 5am for the last few mornings for no good reason. I need sleep but I'm working until Friday when I drive down. I've got a huge task list with work and go straight from London to a conference in Blackpool.
Right now I'm not even focussing on the marathon but more getting through to the end of next week when I have a couple of days off. Life is such a whirlwind right now. There are so many achievements and yet I don't feel like I'm achieving anything.
The hubby is fine. The little one is fine. Cognitive Hypnotherapy is going well. Work is fine. Maybe it's all just too much for me to process. Having spent my whole life believing I was a waste of space, everything I am doing is the opposite of this belief. Maybe it's just too much to comprehend.
So yes, it's a difficult day. But it will pass...