I know, I know, this is old news isn’t it?
But you see I haven’t been able to acknowledge it. All I could see was how I failed. I didn’t run for enough of it. I didn’t have enough energy because I didn’t have the right breakfast.
All the things I knew I should have done I hadn’t.
So completing the marathon gave me no sense of achievement. No buzz. I felt as flat at the end as I had at the start.
In the last 2 weeks I’ve been able to get back to my morning run before I start work. This is the run that I started to clear my head. This is the run that I did to give me energy to get through my day. I need this run.
So yesterday morning, as I ran along the path on my 2 mile route I was thinking.
I thought “This is not easy”
I thought “I should be finding this a lot easier shouldn’t I, I ran 26.2 miles after all”
And then I realised.
Running is not easy for me.
6 hours and 21 minutes was a great achievement for someone like me who doesn’t even like running and struggles to run 2 miles!
I was being way too hard on myself – beating myself up for not running more of the 26.2 miles – but I struggle to run 2.
26.2 miles was an amazing achievement for me.
And now I know I can do it. I have nothing left to prove.
As I struggled along on my 2 mile route I realised that just doing this regularly was an achievement. Getting out and running when I find it so hard is an achievement.
Running a marathon – no matter how long it took – is an achievement when you don’t even enjoy running.
And so now I think I can have a beer and celebrate the fact that I ran the London Marathon this year…and I never have to run a race again. 2 miles a day is fine.